How to Completely Freak Out Galbatorix
by Dragonsrule18
Summary: 51 ways to turn our favorite evil king Galby more insane than he already is. Full title was too long for the title box. Rated T because I'm paranoid.
1. 51 ways

Hi people! If you hate Galbatorix(which we all do), this story is for you. Many thanks to my friend SiriusDoctorWhohoney329(who is also my friend in real life) for helping me come up with some of the ideas on this list. Please also read her stories, for she is an amazing writer

Oh yeah, and I don't own the Inheritance cycle or any of the TV shows mentioned on this list. I'll shut up now and get to the story. Please read and review!!

**How to Completely and Totally Freak Out Galbatorix in 51 Ways**

**1. Sing very loudly, "Do you love me? Do you want to be my friend?"(not the whole song these lines belong to, but just these two lines.)**

**2. Force him to watch Barney.**

**3. Force him to watch Care Bears.**

**4. Misspell/mispronounce his name constantly(not hard to do)**

**5. Doodle on his head in permanent marker while he sleeps.**

**6. When you see his bald head, scream, "AAAHHHH!!! MY EYES!!! I'M BLIND!!!!(cookies to anyone who guesses what TV show that line came from.**

**7. Threaten to tell everyone that he sleeps with a teddy bear named Mr. Snuggles. And then carry out that threat.**

**8. Tell him Durza would make a better king than he does.**

**9. Paint Shruikan pink(with Shruikan's permission of course).**

**10. Fill his room with flowers(preferably the hot pink ones).**

**11. Make him baby-sit a bunch of three year olds.**

**12. Fill his closet to the brim with Care Bears. **

**!3. Give him a makeover while he sleeps(with hot pink lipstick)!!!**

**14. Take pictures of makeover and give to Urgals, Ra-zac, Shruikan, Varden, etc.**

**15. Shout "Galbatorix likes fluffy bunnies!!!" in a very public place.**

**16. Spray paint all his clothes pink, bright yellow with smiley faces, or plaid.**

**17. Give his room flowery wallpaper. Use superglue on it.**

**18. Get him cds: Barney, Barbie, Care Bears, etc.**

**19. Sing the Barney song to him until he cracks.**

**20. Make him sing Barbie Girl.**

**21. Set up a microphone in the room so the whole castle can hear it.**

**22. Repeat 20 and 21 with the Barney song.**

**23. Superglue a clown wig to his head. When he gets mad, say, "It covers up your bald spot." Then run.**

**24. Give Eragon a love letter. Say Galbatorix wrote it. Videotape results.**

**25. Take Shrukian for a joyride when Galby has to go somewhere important.**

**26. Lock him in a barn with the animals from Back at the Barnyard. Bribe Otis to unleash his best pranks. Videotape results.**

**27. Ask him rhetorical questions constantly.**

**28. When he tries to kill you, take him to Doctor Phil to discuss his "anger issues."**

**29. Make him watch Dora the Explorer.**

**30. Exist, especially after doing all that.**

**31. Give his phone number to telemarketers.**

**32. Tie him to a tree. Glue feathers all over him and stick a rubber glove on his head. Take a picture. Post said picture on You tube under the term Chicken on a Stick.**

**33. Make him listen to Jimmy Neutron talk.**

**34. Lock him in a room with Murtagh, who will have duct tape, a super loud stereo, headphones and a CD of The Backyardigans Greatest Hits. Oh, and a camera to tape the hilarity.**

**35. Prank call him constantly.**

**36. Flush the toilet while he's in the shower.**

**37. Call him Baldytorix**

**38. Duct tape him to a chair in a locked room. Make him watch a hundred hours of Barney. Stay away from him when you let him out, in case he (a) wants to kill you, or (b) goes crazy from the lovey dovey-ness of the show and starts acting like Barney. Especially if it's b.**

**39. Sneak into his room late at night. Scream in his ear. Run.**

**40. Tell him Shruikan's going out with Saphira.**

**41. Tickle torture!**

**42. Stand outside his bedroom at midnight. Whisper his name menacingly until he cracks.**

**43. Play evil villain music whenever he walks into a room.**

**44. Laugh at any and all plans he makes.**

**45. Photoshop a picture of him to make it look like he's wearing a wedding dress. Post it on an internet dating site.**

**46. Steal/destroy all his clothes and leave only a pink ballerina tutu in his closet.**

**47. Make sure everyone in the castle sees him in said tutu.**

**48. Imitate his evil laugh- constantly!**

**49. Force him to watch the Eragon movie.**

**50. Compare and contrast him to Doctor Evil.**

**51. Give him Elvish wine, then glue all his furniture to the bedroom ceiling. Videotape results.**

**You are getting very sleepy… When I snap my fingers, you will press that review button. Snap!**


	2. 10 more ways

**Ten More Ways to Freak Out Galbatorix**

**Okay, peoples! Enough people liked this story that I'm adding a second chapter. Thank you to all my reviewers!**

1. Put hot sauce in his toothpaste. Videotape results and put on Youtube under the title "One hot Galba!"

2. Convince Dora the Explorer(ick) and her pet monkey Boots, that Galby is actually Swiper in disguise. Make sure you have a video camera.

3. Put hot sauce in his food and whatever he has to drink(anyone who guesses what TV show this prank comes from gets a cookie!!) Give him dirty dishwater when he begs for a drink.

4. Steal/destroy his clothes(again). Leave him only a pair of frilly pink underwear and a bra with hearts on it.

5. When he is wearing said bra and underwear, slip a sign reading WARNING: TOO GROSS!!! over his neck. Snap a picture quick and run.

6. Tell the Box Ghost from Danny Phantom to follow Galby around all day and do whatever he can to annoy him(that should be easy for the Box Ghost) You can probably pay the Box Ghost in boxes and bubble wrap.

7. Duct taped on rollerskates + waxed floor + Clockwork's help(if you can get it) = Galby in pain. **(I do not own Danny Phantom, so please don't sue!!)**

8. Hug him at random until he cracks.

9. Follow him everywhere(and I mean everywhere) with a video camera. When he asks why(or yells at you to go away), tell him you are making a documentary about a crazy, evil villain who is going to get his butt kicked by a farm boy who only knew about magic and dragons for a year. Run.

10. Force him into an evil villain convention with Dr. Evil, Dark Helmet, and that weird villain I saw in a Care Bears episode I was forced to watch with my 4 year old neighbor.

**There you have it, folks. I do not own the Inheritance Cycle or any of the TV shows and characters mentioned in this list. Pleeeaassseee review!!!!**


	3. Yet another 10 ways

**Yet Another 10 Ways**

**Thanks for all the fabulous reviews! Here is another 10 ways to annoy evil King Galby. I do not own the Inheritance Cycle or any other mentioned TV shows, movies, or books in any of these lists.**

1. Superglue his crown to his head.

2. Superglue his butt to his throne. When he gets mad, tell him, "Ruling a kingdom is sticky business."

3. Replace Galby's hair growth formula with neon purple dye. After he uses it, take a picture and run.

4. Throw a wild party in the castle while Galby is out on an errand. Enough said.

5. Bribe/threaten everyone in the castle to scream, "MY EYES!!! MY EYES!!! I'M BLIND!!!" when Baldytorix passes them.

6. Follow him around and repeat everything he says.

7. Steal/destroy all his bedroom furniture and replace them with a little girl's Disney Princess bed and chair. Hot pink if possible. Superglue them to the floor so they are not removable.

8. Steal his crown and replace it with a feathered hat. Pink or purple if possible.

9. Slip lobsters and/or baby sharks in the tub while he is taking a bath(Eww!!) Run.

10. Continue making these lists.

**There you have it folks! Do you want me to continue making these lists or make a story where these ideas are used on Galby? Please press that pretty green button and tell me what you want me to do.**


	4. List 2, Idea 9

**Hello, dear readers. Sorry about the long wait. My muse took off and my oh-so-dear friend Writers Block paid a visit. Now, we will use the ideas in the two lists on Galby. I'd like to thank InuYashaFreak for letting me use her in this chapter.**

**List 2, Idea 9**

It was a dark, stormy day in Uru'baen the day that the tortures began. Poor unsuspecting Galby woke up bright and early one morning and headed downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast. Suddenly, he heard a voice say, "We are now witnessing mad King Galby forage for food. Knowing him, it will probably be Froot Loops." "Who's there?" Galby boomed. Turning around, he saw no one. Shrugging it off, he grabbed his Froot Loops. "Told ya!" the mysterious voice said.

Galbatorix looked around. Still nobody there. After eating his cereal, he headed back upstairs, still having the strange feeling that he was being followed. He went into the bathroom, closed the door and stepped into the shower. Suddenly the door banged open and he heard the voice again. "King Galby has now entered the bathing hole." Galbatorix opened the shower curtain, to come face to face with a girl holding a video camera.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Galby screamed, trying to cover up- well, everything. "Who are you, and what are you doing in my bathroom?" "My name is InuYashaFreak, and I'm making a documentary." the girl replied. "Well, go away!" he hollered. "But, I have to!" she pleaded. "Don't you want to be famous?"

Galbatorix smiled. "Famous? Well, that changes things." he told her. "Now tell me, what's your little documentary about?" "It's about a crazy, evil villain who's going to get his butt kicked by a farm boy who's only known about magic and dragons for a year." InuYashaFreak replied, laughing.

"Well that's very-HEY!" Galby yelled, then shooting a ray of deadly magic at her, only to have it bounce harmlessly off. His eyes widened. "What the-? Why the-? How the-?" he cried. InuYashafreak laughed, then walked off, dropping a piece of paper on her way out. Galbatorix picked it up. It read, _Acme anti-magic shield. Works great for preventing an evil king you just pranked from killing you. Made with 100% power of the Swartz._

"ARRRGGHHH!" an infuriated Galby hollered. "I'll get you InuYashaFreak! And you too, Acme!"

**IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE!: I am now making this story public. Whoever wants to prank Galbatorix, send me a review saying which idea from either list you want to use, and I will put you in the story like I did with InuYashaFreak. And if you have your own ideas to torture Galby, and I like them, I will put them in the story and you will get full credit for your idea. Hope you are enjoying this story!**


	5. List 1, Idea 7

**List 1, Idea 7**

**Sorry again for the long wait, guys. I'll try to get better with updating. I'd like to thank JedI Tameera Crowe for letting me use her in this chapter.**

Galby woke up and carefully checked around his room for any pranksters. Nothing. He sighed with relief. Maybe what happened yesterday was just a one time thing. Or so he thought.

"You've got a note, Your Majesty," a random soldier told him when he came downstairs, handing him a piece of paper. On it was written _I know your secret. _This made Galbatorix a little nervous. What secret did this random person know? Where the dragon egg was hidden? How he got his power? Or something far, far worse? "I can handle this," Galbatorix told himself. "I just hope they didn't find out my biggest secret."

The morning passed with no word from the mysterious note writer. Then the telephone rang. Galbatorix picked it up. "Hello?" he said. _"Hello Baldytorix," _a female voice said in a scary tone. "Do not call me that, whoever you are!" Galby yelled. "And who the heck are you?" _"My name is Tameera, and I can call you whatever I want to call you. Because I know your secret."_

"What secret?" Galbatorix asked, a little scared. _"I enjoy your fear." _Tameera said, adding an evil laugh for added effect. "What do you know? Tell me! Tell me now!" Galbatorix yelled, almost hysterical. _"All right, all right, I'll tell you what I found out. I found out that you sleep with a teddy bear named Mr. Snuggles!"_

"I do not!" Galbatorix lied. How had a mere girl found out his biggest, most well protected secret? _"I won't tell anyone." _Tameera told him. Galbatorix sighed with relief. "You won't?" he said gratefully. _"Nope. I won't tell anyone; I'll tell everyone!" _With an evil cackle, Tameera hung up. Galby dropped the phone and screamed.

**Hope you all liked it! And sorry again for the long wait! Remember, this is a public story. Review and tell me if you want to be in it, and which idea you want to do. I may even do some reviewer ideas. Remember, more reviews mean more chappies! **


End file.
